I was a bit excited last night, for some politically-connected reasons. I know this is a quasi-neutral and conceited blog, because I blab about nothing except for my daily ramblings, by which of course no one gives a damn about. But as you probably know, the country's political condition as of the present has gone to its critical point. A lot of controversies are popping out here and there, but the truth seems to be hiding somewhere only they know. It's kinda unfair and unruly, don't you think? I mean, I don't usually give a fuck on the latest scoop they got about Lozada's statements, or the latest evidences political advocates keep showing off during those special senate hearings. You know how apathetic I am.
But now, I think I have to give apathy a break.
I went to school this morning half-asleep and half-curious about..well..nothing interesting, really. Just about CBCP or the Catholic Bishops' Conference of the Philippines' pastoral statement the media are trying to get hold of since last night. I was not thinking of our final examinations on Math and Mandarin (damn her), but I was, on the other hand, wondering so much if CBCP decided to join the mob of Filipinos who knew better than to shut up albeit the weird things appearing on news every night. That'll be so cool, I thought. Reminds me of that 20-something year old yellowish video of what happened during the first People Power Revolution, during Ferdinand Marcos' remarkable regime. Nuns praying, a humongous throng with people holding hands and shouting, countless soldiers guarding their places with their shotguns and tanks, helicopters soaring and trying to scare people with their weapons..woah, isn't it? That kind of thing sends me thrills enough to overpass that thrill I get from riding roller coasters.
During our examinations for Mandarin, my adviser suddenly boomed the room with her voice as she opened the door hastily and quickly explained that the circulars she's about to give is about the rally on Friday. And those who are interested should go to Mr. Macapanpan after the exams.
Interested.
Should.
Go.
Rally on Friday, huh? Then that actually means that CBCP agreed..or what?
Well, by the time I got hold of my circular, I stared at the words my eyes first caught hold of : we are not calling for the President's resignation but for the TRUTH. Um, isn't that a bit..wrong? So, yeah. You can just imagine everyone's surprise because this is seriously a first in along time.
I quickly looked at the date just to make sure the pastoral statement I'm hungry for didn't affect any of this. February 26, 2008, it said.
And so, by the time I threw my backpack to my bed and went straight to my computer after school, I quickly browsed for the latest news article about what I'm waiting -and hoping- for, which is the pastoral statement of CBCP. I kept my fingers crossed since last night, hoping they would be more serious about everything and thus agree that the citizens of this country should not only fight for the truth, but for a new and responsible leader as well. Ha. I'm fucking sorry for being such an activist for a while, but my family hates the current leader like hell.
To my disappointment, the pastoral statement simply stated just about everything in the circular. How could they be so unbelievably apathetic? Knowing the TRUTH will only lead us all into wanting her to resign in the end. The TRUTH they're saying is obviously right before our eyes. The government's actions merely disgust us, so why keep it that way?
I wish I can go to that rally on Friday. I just need to.
Badly.
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Ha. And here's another reason why this day had been so weird.
(This will be long. So if you don't want to read, then scram)
| hide details 8:26 PM (2 hours ago) |
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Hey..um..dad.
It's actually my final examination for English and Physics tomorrow, but I'm not really in the mood to study. And besides, with less than a month to go before I fly off to college, slacking off has been ridiculously and inevitably compulsory these days. It's not my fault I'll be exiting high school.
Anyways, I have a weird (more like insanely absurd) confession/theory/hypothesis to blurt out. I'm sorry if I have to disturb your hardworking ass, but this is of (somewhat) a major issue.
Um. I think mom is smoking.
Sorry if this whole nonsense of an email may seem to be, indeed, nonsense to you (it's probably either this sh*t's written in English, my grammatical skills are lower than that of an illiterate, or this issue is relatively out of hand.). But I cannot, for the love of God, think of another better person to babble this with other than my own father and (sigh) my pseudo-hero. I think you understand me better than everyone around me does, which is part-ironic, if you ask me.
BUT YOU HAVE TO PROMISE THAT THIS THINGY IS JUST BETWEEN US, ALRIGHTY? If I hear a word from mom about this, you better look for a replacement for your stupendous daughter.
Here goes my 'evidences' to support my theory:
-Tita Baby, mom's chain-smoking friend, came by this morning to drop something off (or so I think she did). Then suddenly, mom took this Marlboro Lights 20s (Gold) out of her bag and handed it to Tita Baby, asking if they (take note: THEY) need more (or something like that).
-"Natikman ko na yan..medyo matamis" she said suddenly while approaching her friend who's at that nifty sala set you bought a few years ago, and while holding the Marlboro pack. They roared with laughter and mom ended it with.."Napuno ko nga yung ash tray eh".
-"Nakaka-ilan ka per day? Isang kaha?" she asked Tita Baby. Of course I know what the fuck a kaha is. I'll tell you later why.
I am not saying all of this to you to confront mom. I mean, you guys are technically separated anyway, albeit the non-existence of legal documents to thus prove it. It wouldn't really matter if you get mad at her or whatever. I'm just concerned because DUH. She just gave birth 5 friggin months ago, and here she pops out suddenly with a death stick. There are 5 children here, and 4 of which could die because of secondhand smoking. She's giving me yet another reason to leave the premises of this house your money built.
And yeah, I did smoke. For how many days? Four. Four rebellion and hatred-filled days because I have so many problems bombarding me all at the same time. Nobody forced me to smoke. I tried it on my own, because my curiosity is killing me like hell. I can't concentrate at school because the thought of smoking a cigarette would always appear every now and then. I did this because my stupid best friend just [EDIT]. And truly, I was mad as hell. It was the last thing I needed to happen, really. But all things fell into place and I've been carbon monoxide-free for almost a week. I then realized that smoking will never be my thing, and so does doing drugs or whatnot.
But now, I cannot believe my own mom is killing herself slowly with smoking. I'm no advocate, dad. I'm just utterly concerned of my own mother's health. I just want to confront her myself, but that would be very disrespectful. She's still my mom, if you look at it.
I don't know what will I do if this is all true.
It's actually my final examination for English and Physics tomorrow, but I'm not really in the mood to study. And besides, with less than a month to go before I fly off to college, slacking off has been ridiculously and inevitably compulsory these days. It's not my fault I'll be exiting high school.
Anyways, I have a weird (more like insanely absurd) confession/theory/hypothesis to blurt out. I'm sorry if I have to disturb your hardworking ass, but this is of (somewhat) a major issue.
Um. I think mom is smoking.
Sorry if this whole nonsense of an email may seem to be, indeed, nonsense to you (it's probably either this sh*t's written in English, my grammatical skills are lower than that of an illiterate, or this issue is relatively out of hand.). But I cannot, for the love of God, think of another better person to babble this with other than my own father and (sigh) my pseudo-hero. I think you understand me better than everyone around me does, which is part-ironic, if you ask me.
BUT YOU HAVE TO PROMISE THAT THIS THINGY IS JUST BETWEEN US, ALRIGHTY? If I hear a word from mom about this, you better look for a replacement for your stupendous daughter.
Here goes my 'evidences' to support my theory:
-Tita Baby, mom's chain-smoking friend, came by this morning to drop something off (or so I think she did). Then suddenly, mom took this Marlboro Lights 20s (Gold) out of her bag and handed it to Tita Baby, asking if they (take note: THEY) need more (or something like that).
-"Natikman ko na yan..medyo matamis" she said suddenly while approaching her friend who's at that nifty sala set you bought a few years ago, and while holding the Marlboro pack. They roared with laughter and mom ended it with.."Napuno ko nga yung ash tray eh".
-"Nakaka-ilan ka per day? Isang kaha?" she asked Tita Baby. Of course I know what the fuck a kaha is. I'll tell you later why.
I am not saying all of this to you to confront mom. I mean, you guys are technically separated anyway, albeit the non-existence of legal documents to thus prove it. It wouldn't really matter if you get mad at her or whatever. I'm just concerned because DUH. She just gave birth 5 friggin months ago, and here she pops out suddenly with a death stick. There are 5 children here, and 4 of which could die because of secondhand smoking. She's giving me yet another reason to leave the premises of this house your money built.
And yeah, I did smoke. For how many days? Four. Four rebellion and hatred-filled days because I have so many problems bombarding me all at the same time. Nobody forced me to smoke. I tried it on my own, because my curiosity is killing me like hell. I can't concentrate at school because the thought of smoking a cigarette would always appear every now and then. I did this because my stupid best friend just [EDIT]. And truly, I was mad as hell. It was the last thing I needed to happen, really. But all things fell into place and I've been carbon monoxide-free for almost a week. I then realized that smoking will never be my thing, and so does doing drugs or whatnot.
But now, I cannot believe my own mom is killing herself slowly with smoking. I'm no advocate, dad. I'm just utterly concerned of my own mother's health. I just want to confront her myself, but that would be very disrespectful. She's still my mom, if you look at it.
I don't know what will I do if this is all true.
On Wed, Feb 27, 2008 at 9:08 PM, Paragas Ronnie wrote:
Before anything else, I just want to tell you that I'm really impresed with your english writing skills. Are you sure you don't want to get journalism or mass comm in college? j/k lang syempre, I know you had already decided to be a techie. :)
I now feel shy to communicate with you in english. Compared to yours, I feel like a provinciano :)
OK, let's get back to the issue. Thanks for telling me this and of course, I promise that I'l keep this thing just between the two of us. Of course you know that the only reason I still have contact with your mom is only because of you and your brothers and sister.
Smoking? I also tried it before. Not as short as 4 days like you but maybe for 6 months. I smoked occasionally kapag medyo naparami ng kain at toma. Then I stopped when the doctor told me that I'm having high blood pressure. IIs only then I realized that smoking doesn't do anything good. Its not only waste of money but it was also bad for your own and other people's health.
Let's just hope that your mom is just in the 'trying out' stage and soon realize that it will not do her any good. Let's give her a couple of weeks. If she doesn't stop, let's say in a month, then I'll try to find a way to make her realize that she is risking everybody's health.
o cya, relax and try to prepare for your finals. don't let this issue affect you, for now...
Sometimes I think my dad alone can change the world. Well, sort of. I should be with him, really. And together, we will be in harmony.
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