The sluggish situation had just gotten worse.
I don't know how I did it, but I'm really sure it's just the ultimate effect of constantly refusing to take Mac to any Apple Center. Yes, remember that post about my laptop being amusingly dead and all? Well, I haven't done anything to make it any better since.
This has gotten really really sickening, at the most. All I would want to say is that I'm refusing to do responsible things for my gadgets like this for my own good. I don't know, but I'm really feeling that if taking it to an Apple Service Center now would make a sort-of wrong impact on my life.
What's worse? THIS ONE IS.
Now I really have to pass all the universities I would apply into. And for breaking the last record, I would apply to Ateneo just for fun. You know, just so I can say that I also tried our for that stereotyped-in-a-negative-way school.
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Honestly, I still have the breath of summer. I'm not feeling that back-to-school feeling, even if it'll be my last 4th day in school already on Monday. I'm not looking forward to any school-related thing except for graduation, which would ergo happen next year. 9 more months in hell, Lorainne. Just go crawl your way through it.
Let's see now. I have an IP proposal for Physics that is due on Tuesday, Filipino homework about the 1st five chapters of El Filibusterismo, Math homework about Domain and Ranges of a function. I have to study for Economics and Physics. I have to be excited for my surprise elective which I would finally know on Monday.
Tha latter part I obviously like. The first two? I wouldn't mind if ANYONE would want to do it. Heh. How could I refuse? It's like someone would do it or nothing.
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Our date was merely postponed lately.
I don't know how to react. Would I be, uhm, mad? or sad? or cynically happy?
See, I sacrificed reading a chapter about the speed of light in Physics just for that date. I sacrificed talking to dad for the rest of the afternoon just for that date. I actually sacrificed A LOT of things just for that date.
And I decisively didn't mind all those sacrifices being broken for something that was postponed in the end.
What I really did feel was embitterment. Not for him, but for me. I kinda hated myself for anticipating something that has a higher possibility of being adjourned, rather than actually supervening.
I feel passably bad. It's axiomatic that it's feasibly MY fault.
Wait..
is it legitimately me?
I'm mussed up.
This has gotten really really sickening, at the most. All I would want to say is that I'm refusing to do responsible things for my gadgets like this for my own good. I don't know, but I'm really feeling that if taking it to an Apple Service Center now would make a sort-of wrong impact on my life.
What's worse? THIS ONE IS.
Now I really have to pass all the universities I would apply into. And for breaking the last record, I would apply to Ateneo just for fun. You know, just so I can say that I also tried our for that stereotyped-in-a-negative-way school.
------------------
Honestly, I still have the breath of summer. I'm not feeling that back-to-school feeling, even if it'll be my last 4th day in school already on Monday. I'm not looking forward to any school-related thing except for graduation, which would ergo happen next year. 9 more months in hell, Lorainne. Just go crawl your way through it.
Let's see now. I have an IP proposal for Physics that is due on Tuesday, Filipino homework about the 1st five chapters of El Filibusterismo, Math homework about Domain and Ranges of a function. I have to study for Economics and Physics. I have to be excited for my surprise elective which I would finally know on Monday.
Tha latter part I obviously like. The first two? I wouldn't mind if ANYONE would want to do it. Heh. How could I refuse? It's like someone would do it or nothing.
-----------------------
Our date was merely postponed lately.
I don't know how to react. Would I be, uhm, mad? or sad? or cynically happy?
See, I sacrificed reading a chapter about the speed of light in Physics just for that date. I sacrificed talking to dad for the rest of the afternoon just for that date. I actually sacrificed A LOT of things just for that date.
And I decisively didn't mind all those sacrifices being broken for something that was postponed in the end.
What I really did feel was embitterment. Not for him, but for me. I kinda hated myself for anticipating something that has a higher possibility of being adjourned, rather than actually supervening.
I feel passably bad. It's axiomatic that it's feasibly MY fault.
Wait..
is it legitimately me?
I'm mussed up.
An old friend from my old school has been reading this filth long enough for me to find it out.
He then asked if I ever fancied on being a writer and the like. And you know what? I'm going to retell this fervent story all over again.
When I entered a new school for the next educational chapter of my life, my mind seemed to drift philosophically. Not just drifting, but really digging deeper into things that are just concerned with morality per se. I would dwell on something that I would feel pragmatic on. And so, I started my high school life with being a writer as my primary ambition in life.
In a more skeptic way, I found love on expressing myself through this blog and my external journal, which I actually lost in Baguio or somewhere that's not within my vicinity.
I even enjoyed it more when sir John, my English teacher during my freshmen year, told me that he liked my essays because they were all pretty expressive. Heh. You betcha.
Then came sophomore year. I was more than excited to take up Journalism, because that's where my passion undoubtedly lies.
And that's where I lost it. I disliked Journalism not only because of my teacher, but because of it's highly disreputable look in today's society, and the government is lessening journalistic rights little by little each day. Furthermore, by the look of it, disliking Journalism lead me to look for another passion, because I've carved that outlook in my brain.
I thought I definitely annihilated my dream, but in the 1st quarter of my junior year, I actually considered signing up for the school paper. But uh, I developed a very bad mentality that only smart-asses are the only ones deserving to write for the 2nd Best Campus Newspaper in the country. And by the look of it, I seem to be right all along.
Which makes me now, just a blogger. Not a writer, and not wanting nor esteeming to be one.
And please, just go make me a full-pledged computer engineer instead.
Besides, wannabe-writers don't make hardcore grammatical and vocab errors as hardcore-ly as I do.
On the other confusing side, this quote is making me reconsider that passion.
- It is perfectly okay to write garbage--as long as you edit brilliantly.
- - C. J. Cherryh
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